One Year Later: Michael Jackson Gestures During Trial Were Telling

Pop star Michael Jackson gestures during a break in his testimony in his trial in Santa Maria, California in this December 3, 2002 file photo. Fans, museums and some members of Michael Jackson's family will mark Friday's one-year anniversary of the singer's death on June 25, 2010 with special exhibits, tributes and flash mob dances from Manila to Manhattan.

Michael Jackson was known for holding up the peace gesture, what is interesting about this time is while at trial he does not hold it up as confidently as he usually does- his fingers are bent. This could have several meaning...



I do not know if I have ever commented on his guilt or innocence of the charges on this blog? I'll cut to the chase: He was guilty of inappropriate contact with children. His defense was he "never hurt a child" or "could never hurt a child," "I love children." This is very true, but is still illegal under the eyes of the law. Abuse and the abuser usually do not have contact that "feels bad" and certainly does not "hurt" in cases where the child is groomed for physical contact. Did you know that the exhilarating rush you get from riding roller coasters releases the same chemical in our brain as sex does? For children this can be confusing; Neverland Ranch was probably a very confusing place for every guest and visitor.

In the book Crime Signals the author discusses a similar case where a grown man offered fast rides on his motorcycle to get boys excited, touched them on their legs while riding, then later abused them because they were familiar with certain feelings (that mimic sexual feelings) in the presence of this man.

Jackson himself admitted to being sexually abused, and his less than ordinary life lead him to become peers with children. To him he was just one of the boys, and it was consensual sex, where both partners are freely and willingly agreeing, or consenting, to whatever sexual activity is occurring. In his mind there was nothing wrong with his actions, but we all know this is an area where the bending of reality does not excuse inappropriate contact with a minor and the experience(s) forever changes a child's personality and life.

He never directly denies the allegations in any interview or statement given. If you are interested search the Internet with his name and statement analysis...

Psychologist Leigh Baker of the Trauma Treatment Center of Colorado is an expert on sexual predators and abuse; Leigh has developed the five stages of sexual predators' progression to abuse and is must for anyone working in the field and/or anyone who wants to learn how to protect our young children. Without Baker's work this post would not be possible.◦

One Year Later: Michael Jackson Gestures During Trial Were Telling

Warning to All Parents

Something that has become all to clear in the last month, across the country, attempted abductions of children are up. I have to believe this is indirectly tied to:

-The mostly successful kidnapping pulled off by Phillip Garrido where he successfully kidnapped Jaycee Lee Dugard and held her for nearly two decades;
-The popularity of Dateline's To Catch a Predator series of investigating shows where they lure people to homes thinking they will have sex with underage girls;
-Several high profile missing, presumed abductions of, children without a single arrest in the last year.

While 99.9% of us find this repulsive, there is that small percentage of sickos who are inspired by this success and become inspired to act on their sick impulses.

I'm afraid this is not going to lessen in the coming months and years. In the area I live in, the amount of suspicious persons (strangers) speaking to children is on the rise according to local police- many of these sickos are in the beginning stages of working up to an actual abduction. On the local news almost every night there are reports of attempted abductions, and this is occurring across the country.

If you are a parent please take a moment and click on this link of past posts that are helpful in spotting pedophiles and pay closer attention to protecting our kids.◦

Warning to All Parents

Teach Your Children to Turn or Twist Away From Any Touch

Any touch lasting longer than 1-3 seconds from an adult should make you suspicious.

Without telling them why, it is important to address any touch from an adult with your kids.

While kids are taught about 'good' and 'bad' touch... if it gets to the point where they are in the area of a 'bad' touch, chances are it started with a 'good' touch.

A predator will gauge their victims, by first touching a shoulder or the top of the head. If your kid does not react with a tense neck and/or shoulders, or a turn or twist away it is a sign of vulnerability. Appearingly innocent touching could develop into tickling, which then could morph to abuse.

This post has been developed as a result of the work from Psychologist Leigh Baker of the Trauma Treatment Center of Colorado. Leigh has developed the five stages of sexual predators' progression to abuse.◦

Teach Your Children to Turn or Twist Away From Any Touch

Con Men and Predators Will Look You in the Eye

Eye contact. It’s a sign of truthfulness.

The problem is that swindlers, con men and sex offenders have known this for centuries.

Psychologist Anna Salter, says, "If a sex offender is breathing who doesn’t know to keep good eye contact when hcs lying, I haven’t met him yet. Eye contact is universally known to be a sign of truth-telling. People can fake eye contact; therefore, in reality, it absolutely is not a sign of truth-telling because liars will fake anything it is possible to fake—a commonsense conclusion that research confirms."

A man who raped dozen of children told Anna, "The manner that I use when I was trying to convince somebody— even though I knew I was lying—I’d look them in the eye. but I wouldn’t stare at them. Staring makes people uncomfortable and that tends to turn them away, so I wouldn’t stare at them. But look at them in a manner that, you know, look at this innocent face. How can you believe that I would do something like that?” It helps if you have a good command of the vocabulary where you can explain yourself in a way that is easily understood. Dress nice. Use fluent hand gestures that are not attacking in any way."◦

Con Men and Predators Will Look You in the Eye

Don't Stand to Close to... that child- Pedophiles and Proximity to Others.

There are social norms of how close we stand next to others, and visa versa. One way to spot a pedophile is they will violate these norms with children.

You might think this would be easy to spot- but with children, who are unfamiliar with these norms, and are sometimes moving all the time, it can go unnoticed.

There is a bubble around most people of approximately 18 inches that is consider "personal space." We only let those very closest to us in this area, and it is generally reserved for those we are dating/married/immediate family.

As we grow older, less and less people are "allowed" in this area. As we grow older we will feel more uncomfortable with allowing others in this area.

To the pedophile they can naturally enter this zone under the guise of natural friendship: it could start with a pat on the head; or leaning into the child who is standing next to them as them compliment them to their parents.

Obviously watch for the zone infraction; but combine this watchfulness with this question, "Would the invasion of personal space make yourself uncomfortable if you were in the child's position?"

In today's time, where everyone who works with children should know the rules of what is appropriate, if you see this type of space infraction be warned and on alert. There should be no difference between a child and adult in regards to the personal bubble of intimate space.

This warning is quite different for the previous post on this subject- if you are comparing the body language the two different personalities described in the two posts- they exist at two different ends of the continuum. What I have described here is the body language of the type of predator who places themselves in position(s) where they are working and interacting with children to further their sexual wants.

WARNING: Not every invasion of your child's personal space warrants an investigation, it should put you on guard. 99% of the people who work as teachers, religious leaders, scout leaders are doing so innocently and without hidden personal motives.◦

Don't Stand to Close to... that child- Pedophiles and Proximity to Others.

One Way to Spot a Pedophiles or Shoplifter in Real Life with Their Body Language

This is the one area where I was clearly able to spot before any training in body language.

Note: Everybody acts differently depending on the situation. To say it more concretely, if you see a man you see acting in the way I describe below, he could be acting that way because he HATES kids and becomes nervous around them. I only offer this as a guide to be more aware and careful with your own kids.

I first learned to spot shoplifters while working at a grocery store. I then noticed the same behavior with potential pedophiles after I had my own kids.

The spot or tell is clearly seen when you know what to look for. The first time I saw this I was working in the meat department after school. Everybody had to pass by the meat counter to enter the store and almost immediately I could pick out potential shoplifters. I got so good at it all I had to do was give a quick call to the manager up in the office, he had a one way mirrored window and could watch the shoplifter from his lofty perch. I made the call a couple of times a week, and I only worked there for 2-3 hours an evening.

What to look for? 90% Gestures and 10% eyes.

Both the shoplifter and pedophile uses very little gestures.

Their movements are controlled and planned to the point where it always appearedto me as unnatural.

With the shoplifter they will pick up a few things, but it is all for show- and you can tell it is for show by the way they hold items higher and away from their body- then they pick up the thing they are going to pocket and you can tell by how they reach for it and the speed of their arms and hands. They appear to be browsing but the scan of the store is unnatural and their eyes will even pay much more attention to other people in the store than the actual merchandise. If you want to identify the shoplifter simply concentrate on the lack of gestures and controlled movements.

The pedophile is similar in many ways. When they see a object of their affection they also get "tight" and gesture less. They most often quickly look away, for fear someone will see them watching someone else. They will glance around more, and often will focus on adults closest to who they really want to look at, so they can use their peripheral vision to watch the child. It looks slightly unnatural compared to how others there are acting. They glance at many different people so it does not look obvious that they would be looking at a child, but they will hold the gaze a slight beat or two more than the others he is glancing at. Children are fast and move in a nonstop way, this works to the pedophiles advantage and disadvantage. It allows them to scan, but if you are looking for it, it gets them caught because their gaze settles a beat too long. If you want to identify the potential pedophile simply concentrate on the lack of gestures.

What to do with this information? Nothing and Everything.

I rarely get involved with shoplifters, people are crazy and willing to do all kinds of stupid things for drugs, etc. I can spot undercover security as clearly as the shoplifter (they look both too natural and unnatural; and even though they do not interact with others working at the store you can tell by the way hold eye contact a beat too long, or quickly avoid eye contact with clerks; etc.). A couple of times I've done is a quick double take at the shoplifter, show disgust, and simply walk away- this is enough for security to pick up on them and at least notice them. Other times I have starred at them, I've even acted like security browsing items in the same isle. It all depends on the situation.

Potential pedophiles are a different ball game. I can never be sure why they are acting strangely so I am immediately on guard. I study the person and determine the level of threat. I see if they are alone. If they are alone I'll make it a point to be closer to the individual so I can more closely examine the situation. In my 20 years of being able to see this behavior I've seen 10 or so people that put me on high guard. Of course I can do very little other than make my presence known subtly and not so subtly, and take responsibility for each and every child in the area.

Note: This only works with the strangers. It does not work at all with those who have mastered the art of being placed in an authority position with our children (teachers, camp leaders, etc).
There is also another thing I need to mention, not ALL pedophiles act the same way. We obviously need to be careful and always be on the guard, especially with those we place our trust of our children in.◦

One Way to Spot a Pedophiles or Shoplifter in Real Life with Their Body Language